Tuesday, August 2, 2011

This 'n' That

I am trying, lately, to not spend a lot of frivolous money on myself, because I am still paying off my last trip to New Orleans and I want to clear the decks, as it were, before I plan my next trip.    But I recently bought myself a set of 'promise rings' from Tumbleweed Bead Company, and I love them!   They are super thin, made of recycled silver, and the idea is that each ring represents a promise I am making to myself, a sort of visible reminder of things I am working on.    I've always been a sucker for commitment, and since I am the only one who is interested in my own pledged troth, I figured I would ring myself.   I got a set of three, but I gave one of them to my sister so that she could do something nice for herself, too.
Speaking of rings, I own a really beautiful (nearly) 1-carat diamond solitaire, given to me years ago in an ill-fated engagement.  Don't get me started on THAT!  Anyway, he insisted that I keep the ring, but I returned it.   A few years later, he gave it back to me again as a gift, in front of witnesses, saying he wanted me to keep it.   [He also said that if he had a nickle for every diamond ring he'd given a woman he would be a rich man.   In case you wanted a hint as to why things didn't work out.]  

Disappointments aside, I had never had (and had ALWAYS wanted) a diamond ring, and I really, really loved this ring.   It was a shock to me how much of a traditionalist romantic I am at heart, I so badly wanted the happily-ever-after fantasy, even when it should have been clear that I was looking in the wrong place for it.    Anyway, when he insisted, I decided I WANTED THAT RING, even if I was glad to have opened my eyes about the relationship, so I finally accepted it and put it away for some future relationship.    Somebody else's future relationship, that is, because I couldn't see actually wearing it myself, no matter how much I really, really loved that ring.

And now I seem to have lost it.   The last time I looked at the ring was just before my last trip to New Orleans (the one I am still paying the bills for).   I went into my jewelry pouch last week for another piece of jewelry and it isn't there.    I suspect that I put it in one of those dreaded Safe Places before my trip, but I have no idea where that might be.   Obviously, I've looked everywhere I can think of, but so far I haven't found it.   I need to start looking in places I CAN'T think of.    I will be awfully glad when it finally turns up, and I hope it will be soon, but who knows where it could be?!   Maybe I should clean out the freezer!   It is the prettiest ring I've ever had, and I would like to think that one of my grandkids would enjoy it somewhere down the line.   I hate losing things.   These "senior moments" are enough to make me crazy!   Although I suspect I was prone to flaky moments even when I was young.

Work continues to work itself out, as it were.   I am learning to do the things that were new, and discovering new things that need to be learned.    I am still working on creating a reflection space where the old, very formal, very denomination-specific chapel used to be.   People are using it more often, so I think I am on the right track.    This is what it looked like soon after I came in, but after some of the religious trappings had been removed.

And this is what it looks like now, a work in process.   I am still planning to move in more 'soft' seating, to create wall hangings made of mementos from out patients,  to build shelves for the plants, to move out the altar table and organ, and to fix the broken fountain.


 Baby steps.

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