Sunday, March 10, 2013
If I'd Only Known
Again this week, I held a sobbing woman as she told me all the things she would have said "if I'd only known that things would happen this quickly." I am here to tell you that death is tricky like that. Our brain has a million protective screens that make it impossible for us to be objective when it slips into our lives, our families, and no matter how long the diagnosis, no matter how grimly obvious the symptoms. I work only with people who have been sent to a hospice, for crying out loud, and yet almost no one is prepared when death occurs.
So for the benefit of those of you who have people in your life who are alive, take my advice. Say it now. Tell them you like/love/value/treasure them. Tell them that you forgive them. Tell them that they are worth it, that they are enough. Tell them that you are willing to try to work things out. I don't care if they're embarrassed, or even if they push you away. Say it. Say it. Say it. Someday, when you are surprised that things happened this quickly, I think you'll be glad you did.