Sunday, September 23, 2018
Checking In & Whining
My goodness, I am amazed at how much work there is in planning the smallest, simplest wedding. We are only inviting family, and only family members who live close by, at that -- we will have a second, much larger celebration after the Michigan wedding in Illinois, where the bulk of my fiancé's family will gather -- so fewer than 40 people are expected. We are far too small a group to justify the large halls that are nearby, and many of the smaller venues had a minimum of 50 people. It is not a big group, but it is too many people to mingle comfortably in either of our houses. The challenge was unexpected -- it took us 7 weeks to find and lock down a venue -- but we finally jumped that hurdle this week.
And now I need to find a dress. I know many women who shop, and who dress, and who are lovely. I am not that woman. It was my stated intention to never wear anything again, now that I am retired, except jeans and t-shirts. And yet here I am. My beloved is not on board with my suggestion that I wear jeans and a t-shirt that states "BRIDE" on the chest. And since he will be wearing kilts, I will not wear pants. So I have been shopping myself into a panic.
This chore is not as easy as you might think. I am nearly 70, short, not in the best shape of my life, formed something like a cantaloupe or at least a roma tomato, with arms that no one needs to see bare, and nothing nothing nothing looks good on me. I will not wear white and probably should not wear black or navy, my go-to colors. And anyway, nothing nothing nothing looks bridal on this body.
Our guests are a casual group, only one or two of them are likely to even own a suit, but even if our invitations didn't say "business casual/daytime," I would not be inclined to wear the full ballgowns that my sister favors, although I recognize (having been told repeatedly) that I am allowed to be more formally dressed than our guests. I don't help the process, I guess, because I don't want long, don't want short, don't want sparkle, but don't want to disappoint my groom, either, by not dressing the part to the best of my ability. I will not admit to anyone how may dresses I've tried on, or how much I've spent on ordering and returning internet purchases, and so far all to no avail.
I think I've tried really hard to find something, but now I need to try harder, because now we've set a date -- December 8 -- and the invitations have been mailed. We are starting to work on the ceremony and have talked to the officiant. It's getting real, y'all, and I need to find something to wear. Yes, I know that this is a silly and fortunate problem to have. I am so very lucky, and we are happy and excited . . . but I can't help but wonder, just a bit, if I should have talked him into a courthouse wedding before we got this snowball rolling!
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