Start At The Beginning

Recently I talked to the loveliest family about the journey of loss they were experiencing. They told me how precious their mom was, how much they valued these last days with her and how all the petty grievances of their childhood – toward her and toward one another – had melted away. They explained that they were going through a lot of sadness, but so much beauty, too, as they re-discovered one another. They mentioned over and over the beauty and preciousness they'd discovered and regretted that they hadn't better appreciated it sooner.   

I promised them that each of them had that same beauty and preciousness as their mom, and that maybe this time with their her could help them recognize and value their own unique light, and how loved and loveable they each were.   Maybe they could embrace the truth of that now, while they were healthy and likely had years ahead of them. They all cried and hugged one another, full of grief and joy, that rare combination that I am privileged to see so often in this work. 

As I walked away, my inner voice spoke up and chided; hey there, missy, what about the preciousness of you? Maybe it's time for you, too, to give some value to your own gifts and your own needs.   Maybe it's time to decide that you might be loveable, too.  And after another long day of standing witness to the end of life, I acknowledged that my inner voice might be onto something.

Month One of 2013 is coming to an end. So far, pretty much nothing is going as well as I hoped or as badly as I sometimes feared.   Clearly this is going to be the Best Year Ever.